These are the pictures that I have of me and my baby girl, Ayanna.  My boyfriend, Isaac, is the guy in the picture with us.  She was born March 22 and weighed 8 pounds even.  She's grown soooo much in the past month it's crazy!  I love her so much!  She's amazing!

I'm moving in two days...Can we say super exciting? I can't wait to get out of this house! Not that it's a living hell, but it's time. Way past, if we're going to be honest. So now I'll be living on 38th and Penn...yea! Can't hardly wait to be gone...it's going to be a thing of beauty...

I can't contain it anymore: I finally got myself a wonderful, adoring, hunky man who makes me blissfully happy. Take that existence!

So you know how sometimes you get down and talking to someone helps? Well right about now that would be fabulous, but apparently there's not enough time for me to actually talk to anyone about what's going on in my life. Which is fine. I just really wish I had a friend to talk to right now..."Just because some people don't cry, doesn't mean they're not suffering."

So I've been thinking lately, about a multitude of things, and here are some of the conclusions that I've reached:
1.) I'm going to be single for the rest of my life more than likely, since the only guys who are interested in dating me are attached.
2.) I need to get out more.
3.) I'm becoming a responsible adult.
4.) Some of my friends suck. A lot.
5.) I really need a vacation away from everybody and everything.
6.) I believe I'm going to be a recluse for a while.

So there you have it folks. Don't be surprised if I fall off the face of the Earth for a while. Not that anybody who may read this will actually care, but it's up here all the same. "I may live by the sword, but you can die by my gun."

So I've found myself in a rut lately. Same old, same old, nothing much ever changes around here. Now, I like to think that this is because I just work so much and I'm focused and I have a goal, but really I'm pretty sure I'm just a boring person. I'm going to start knitting, accumulate 100 cats, and start telling everyone that I'm 75 years old but when I was in my early 20's I discovered the fountain of youth. I think that's pretty believable.
Anyway, nothing momentous has really occurred anytime in oh, the past year or so. I got a new car about a month ago. It's beautiful. I love it so much, mainly because it's all mine. Let's see...I got a promotion at work, so that was cool. More money, more hours. Also, more responsibility. Scary. I might be going back to school in the next six months or so. Cross your fingers on that. It's all pretty dependent, okay, completely dependent on whether or not I have the money for it at that point in time. However, barring any horrific tragedies that may befall me, I should be able to do it. Here's hoping!
Alright, I'm done. Peace out bitches!

I am becoming one of those bitter, cynical people that I used to hate. Wait, maybe I should rephrase that. I have been bitter and cynical for a while, but now it's starting to make me a very angry, impatient person. Work sucks, people suck, and this weather sucks. I'll be 22 in 9 days and guess what I'll be doing on my birthday...working. Not like it's that big of a deal anyway because I probably wouldn't have ended up doing anything anyway, but it's the principle of the matter. I have to work on my birthday. Ugh. I've been working about 55 to 60 hours a week the past few weeks. This has made me extremely irritable and volatile. Just so you know. I don't have time to do anything anymore. I haven't even started my Christmas shopping yet. I still have to go out and seriously look for a car, but I don't even have time to do that. "Bah Humbug!"

So sometimes I wish I could somehow apologize for the idiocy of my gender. Not because I in someway believe it's my fault females can be morons or because I in some way feel responsible for them and their actions...I just wish I could make everyone see that it isn't just a gender issue as far as stupid females are concerned. For example, there are a plethora of stupid males out there. I could list quite a few instances of this, but I choose not to. Why? Because it would be pointless and asinine. And also because whatever I would list, people would just chalk that up to guys being guys. Not fair. I said it. I want to know why it is acceptable for males to act the way they do (i.e. ignorant, bastardly, immature, etc.) and it is allowed without hardly a second thought, but when females do the same thing, they are labeled as bitches and are pretty much scorned. I don't care that "society" has decided this is so; it is more a matter of each individual forming their own opinions and deciding what is so for themselves. I think no matter what people say, when they have formed and hold to a stereotype, they are in some way influenced by the masses. Otherwise, in my own opinion, they would take each person as they came without prejudice or a generally pessimistic attitude. A lot of the time, I think we just get back what we put out into the universe, consciously or not. I know life isn't fair, and you have to deal with the restrictions that your culture places upon you, but I say fuck that. Be original. Decide for yourself what you view as acceptable or not and live by your own standards. Because, let me tell you, there is a lot of hypocrisy out there. I am not saying that I am excluded from this, however at least I can recognize the fact that I don't always act like I should or that I am the best person out there. I'm just saying I can at least recognize the fact that I mess up too, and therefore I allow room for others to make mistakes, to be flawed. It serves me no good to immediately assume that anyone I ever meet who shares a major characteristic with one or several people who have messed up (in relation to myself) will in turn be exactly like their predecessors. I eliminate a lot of possibilities in doing this. I rather prefer to think that we should all live on a case by case basis, forming individual impressions and ideas, rather than grouping and categorizing lump sums of people. That's just me though. "Everyone is a prisoner of his own experiences. No one can eliminate prejudices - just recognize them."

So you know what's great? When a drunk driver totals your car and they don't have any car insurance...It's awesome.

So Joe and I were sitting at Steak and Shake (surprise, surprise) discussing God only knows what when for whatever reason he wanted to know what I would do if I were to intentionally kill his family. So I just attempted to write out what I was going to do and post it up here, but I got a little carried away with what I was going to do and couldn't bear to do it. That is, post it. So Joe, at a later date, I will relay all of the information to you. However, putting it in a forum where anyone can stumble upon it makes me extremely uncomfortable, so I will not be doing that. Sometimes, my imagination frightens me. "Use your imagination not to scare yourself to death but to inspire yourself to life."